Mom, You May Not Have Known All of This…

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MeAndMommy

To My Wonderful Mommy!

For this Mother’s Day I’ve been reflecting on how really special you are, and how truly blessed I am, to have you as my mom! So many times in my life, I’ve been reminded why God has hand-picked you to be my mother, and I’ll never truly be able to express the magnitude of what you mean to me. But I will try…

I love you for so many reasons. I won’t be able to name them all at this time but here a few of my top reasons why you are an amazing mother.

Of course, like most people, your kindness stands out right away! You have a compassion for people that is so genuine and pure that even when people meet you for the first time, you leave a lasting impression. You are always thinking of other people, most times before yourself.

As my mom, your compassion has most touched my life through your patience with me. I’ve heard the stories of you staying up late at night to comfort me as a baby with colic. Not an easy thing to do, even when the baby is your own flesh and blood. But there I was, a child not of your womb, who would wail my eyes out due to discomfort and you would console me…rock me…comfort me until the late hours of the night.

As a child growing up, you still stayed up late with me…this time you were running to comfort me in the middle of the night because of my emotional pain.  I remember how you would come running from out of your bed to be by my side because you would hear me crying. There were things I didn’t understand about my adoption. Things I misunderstood about my adoption…And I know I cried because I felt rejected by my birthmother. I was terrified of being unwanted. You would tell me “I was special” but I couldn’t understand how or why someone would give away “someone that was so special.” There were words I said that must have hurt your heart. What strength God had to give you, to listen to me desiring the love of a mother I never met, when I had the most amazing mother loving me abundantly every day.

Thankfully you could hear past my words and understand there was a young heart that was confused and hurt. Thankfully, God gave you words to encourage me, as you rubbed my back ‘til my tears stopped. Those words I remember to this day… “I know it’s hard sometimes but God has a plan for you. I love you and daddy loves you. And God loves you…Don’t worry honey, God has a plan for you…”

 

Which is the next biggest reason why I love you and am grateful for you: you affirm and encourage me in EV-ERY-THING! Maybe it is because I’m adopted and you and dad really did not know what to expect, so you just assumed every- and anything was possible! In a world (my small PA town at the time) where I looked very different from almost everyone around me-family included- you reminded me that my differences are what make me great. You were always quick to point out my strengths. I don’t think there was a day in my childhood or adolescent life when you didn’t compliment me. Small things like, “Oh Libby, the way the sun reflects off your hair gives it the coolest hint of red. It’s so pretty!” And you would rub my arms and note how “beautiful (my) brown skin is. (I) got the best of both worlds and what a great mix.” Unlike your “pale, milky skin,” you would say.

When I mixed my different potions with dad’s old college test tubes and drew my inventions you told me, “you could be an engineer one day!”

When I rubbed your back after sitting at a desk all day, you’d remark, “You have really strong hands. You could be a masseuse one day!”

When you found out I was making money at school selling extra sodas, you quipped, “You could have your own business one day!”

Even when I declared I was gonna win a gold medal like Jackie Joyner-Kersee, Win a Grammy like Janet Jackson, and then set up a wild-life reserve to save chimpanzees in Africa like Jane Goodall! Through a chuckle you said, I could do it!

YOU helped me to stop thinking that I was a “mistake” and to start believing I was a miracle! That regardless of human plans, God had a plan and a destiny for my life. And because you constantly reminded me of that, I had hope! I could dream and believe great things for my life. And you believed them too!

You also bragged about them too! To almost everyone! This is the next biggest thing I love about you: your unashamed, pride and affection for us.

Now I realize many people have parents who may embarrass them, but not everyone has parents who embarrass them with such an exorbitant amount of pride like you do! I mean you go above and beyond to let everyone know how accomplished and how special we are to you.

From the college-recruiters to the teenager working the window at the drive-through, they all were told the story of how “It took 10 years to adopt her. She is an amazing girl. This kid can do just about everything. And she’s even got better grades than her older brothers! Isn’t she beautiful!?” And naturally, they all said, “yes.” Because let’s face it, after an intro like that, they had no choice but to agree.

And of course, I was completely embarrassed every, single time, you introduced me. But in my heart, deep down, I was swelling with confidence and gratitude. Those words I always locked away but in times of self-doubt, I would pull them out and replay them through my mind. In moments as a young adult, when I felt unwanted by boys, left-out by friends, or looked over for jobs I remember what a family friend once pointed out,”you’re adopted!? Oh, your parents wanted you!” So no matter what, regardless of anyone else, I could always count on you (and dad) to want me and be proud of me. So that drove me to continue to give my best in all that I do. Hey, I need to give you new things to brag about right!?

 

So I wanted to take a moment and brag about you…

How you are the kindest human being.

How you have the world’s greatest laugh and it’s my favorite sound on earth.

How some of my best days include a series of your super-tight hugs and kisses squishing my cheeks!

How your perseverance motivates me to be as strong as you one day.

And I’m so grateful for how connected we are! Even across miles, when something “just didn’t feel right,” I’m grateful you trusted your instincts and always seemed to call me at the perfect time.

You are uniquely you and you do not apologize for your “weirdness” so I have grown up with permission to do the same!

Mom, because of your many sacrifices when I was a child, in the form of late night back rubs, prayers, and hours spent, I now have an unshakable belief in God.

Because I know there must be a God who loves me tremendously to allow me to spend this lifetime with you.

 

I love you mom.  I hope every day I can make you feel like it’s Mother’s Day!

– your pumpkin puddy

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